Stereotyping

Do you have a  friend who goes by the name of Abednego,Bosco, Fidelius/Fidellis? Does their tribe happen to be Kamba. Well, don't ask how I know, but some names are more commonly used by some communities than others.

Have you been to public campus? did you notice how your roommate/classmate has/had friends from the same constituency. did you notice that even his/her girl/boyfriend comes from the same constituency that they do. did you notice that they used to walk /hang around, drink and have fun with guys from their home constituency; how they used to talk in their mother tongue-most of the times very loudly in case you missed it- punctuating it with loud laughter? Noticed how some guys affiliated to a tribe from Western Kenya talks as if they are forcing their talking from their throats such that they pronounce lots of "eeh"? did you notice how they love wearing shorts?

Sorry about the wait, someone just knocked on my door, and wondered what I was doing awake past 1.00 a.m. in the Night. The person has also gone ahead to point out that of all the rooms where lights are on past 1.00 a.m., one or more of the inhabitants is a student in the ICT department. Anyway, why is the guy always walking around with a bunch of keys in their hands.

They remind me of the prefects and junior prefects back in high school and how they always carried a bunch of keys in their hands, no matter how deep their pockets were. Also reminds me of Clay Muganda, his beef with guys who drive white Toyota's, and how he helped us notice that they always carrying their car keys in their hands. Talking of white Toyotas, why is it hard to find a Matatu that is older than KAU and is a Toyota on our crowded highways?

Still on Matatus, why is it that most matatu drivers and conductors will speak to another foreign matatu crew in Kikuyu. This is true for almost all matatus in the greater Central Kenya i.e. areas in a 300km radius of Nairobi. Is is a requirement that you must speak Kikuyu to be a successful matatu driver/conductor?

And why is it that Matatu crew for Thika bound Matatus will rarely want to return your change. Why is it that matatu's associated with Thika will be notorious for dropping passengers before reaching their destination. Why is it that when you seat on the first row of seats in a 14 seater matatu that you will be most likely to loose your phone. Why is it that you are also likely to loose your phone when your window is open and your are 'facebooking' in a 14 seater matatu.

Talking of Facebook, why is it that we can be very close friends on Facebook but barely talks or know each other physically, or vice versa. Why is it that when am on Facebook that one is more likely to stumble on topless or nude pictures of ladies more than men.  What is the obsession of ladies with their birthday suits. Can't they keep their suits on like their male counterparts, especially those from the School of Education, who are more likely to have a coat and mismatched trousers on compare to guys from other schools.

Why is it that members of AIESEC club in your campus are likely to pay Kshs. 2000 for a dinner than members of any other club paying Kshs. 400 for a similar dinner?

Why is is it that campus girls are likely to be hanging around that guy's noisy borrowed car than his neighbour's quiet room?

Is it because you are a stereotype?

What is your stereotype?

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Life in the Public Campus: 30 minutes before class

Apart from been a blogger who rants and complains about everything, like people haven't got problems of their own, I also happen to be a student. I happen to be the not-your-average student in a Public Kenyan university. I have decided that I would be doing several of my readers a favor by occasionally blogging about aspects of campus life.

I am going to narrate a story based on a few lies and several true stories. Its up to the reader to figure out which is which. The story was penned( in a bad handwriting characteristic of a bunch of campus students) slightly more than an year ago, in a boring campus lecture. I bumped into the story in a recent boring lecture(most are even more boring than high school classes) in an exercise book which I had recycled from a previous semester. Been an environmentalist, I discovered that I had various empty exercise books left over from previous units. If you are wondering why they are empty yet I had completed the semester, I researched, and preliminary results indicated that one out of several things may have occurred, namely:-

• The Lecturer rarely attended class
  
• The student rarely attended lectures
  
• The lecturer heavily relied on use of handouts hence rendering note-taking redundant
  
• The student was too lazy to jot down notes
• A combination of 2 or more of the above factors

Before you forget , we were talking of a story, which had been written in the back of a recycled exercise book and which I present to you below, in it's original form.

***
Class was supposed to start at 11, I arrived at 11.10 am. See, it's not my fault that i arrived late for class. At 10.59, I was still asleep, waking up at 11.00 a.m. At 11.01, I was my trousers and shirts simultaneously , between 11.02 and 11.04  looking for my shoes. I found one shoe at 11.03 and the other at 4 minutes pass 11. I then searched for my exercise book at 5 minutes past 11.  6 minutes past 11 found me in the washroom and my walk to class began at 11.07, eventually arriving in class at 10 minutes past 11.

As I walked into class late, I accidentally stepped on a chic as I tried to find a seat in the crowded room. Coincidentally  I happened to seat next to her.

At 11.12, I came to a conclusion that either I musty be in the wrong class, or the lecturer was plain boring. So I did the next best thing, and struck a conversation with the girl who I was now seated next to.  The topic was my lateness to the now boring lecture.

I told her how I had been dreaming at 10.48, still sleeping at 10.49 .....

She was  kind enough to advise me on how to make it to class early, and gave herself as an example. to make it in time for the 11 o' clock class, she underwent the following preparations:-

10.25 Starts calling a guy, then decides to hang up
10.26 SMS the guy above
10.28 Empties her bucket
10.30 Apply foundation for washing face
10.31 - 10.38 Goes to washroom to wash her face
10.38 - 10.42 Apply makeup
a0.43 - 10.45 Look for handbag no. 2
10.46 Empty handbag 1
10.47 Put belongings in  handbag 2
10.48 Look for phone
10.49 Start going to class
10.50 Return to room for umbrella
10.51 Finally go to class

Wet Cement Part 2

Like the footprint on wet cement, even before my previous note dried up, we are having issues with wet cement again, literally.

This time round, a building under construction came down, killing several people in the process. This is the second time it is happening in Kenya within 3 months. In fact, In Kenya, it is no longer news for a building under construction to collapse. It has become a statistic which we can comfortably account for.

We can even give you a mathematical function detailing the number of Kenyans who will be burried in wet cement in a collapsed building next year, all this within an error margin of less than 10.

As for the owners, they pattern is that they will "go missing" till the event is no longer enjoying high ratings in the news.

Matter of fact, we can even come up with a Kenyan TV reality show titled "collapse". I assure you that Collapse will be quite a successful reality show and that there will be enough grim footage to last you several seasons.

You can even take part by setting foot in any building under construction in Kenya. Chances are high that you will make it to the show.